Under a Blue Moon

Decor, cooking, organization, all the pretty things

Open house

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I read a blog the other day where the writer was commenting on some aspect of her life, in an introspective way.  She had numerous comments of the ‘hang in there’ ‘you are doing great’ variety.  And then there was a reply from one of her readers that may have been well intentioned, or perhaps not.  But the reader was offering up advice on what she perceived the writer’s issues to be.  She was very blunt, she was, and had quite a lot to weigh in on.

Now keep in mind the writer of the blog wasn’t asking for advice, opinions or even commiseration.  She was just writing (okay – that is me projecting but she certainly didn’t outright ASK for any of those things).  What surprised me most about the reader’s response was not so much that she offered unsolicited advice but, more importantly, that she thought she had full insight to the writer’s life and situation and could weigh in on such matters.

I don’t know about you but for me writing a blog is rather like inviting you over for dinner.  What you see when you walk in the door is two hours of frantic dusting and much needed toilet scrubbing.  Oh sure I’d like you to think the floor is always this shiny and candles are always glowing away on the mantle.  I just ask that you don’t look under the beds or too closely at the hall closet whose door is bulging rather ominously.

What you read here is a pretty, dusted off portion of my life.  Oh it’s real all right but it’s not the entire picture.  It’s not like I have any deep, dark secret I’m trying to hide ~ goodness no ~ my life is actually rather dull in that regard.  It’s more that I want you to come back and showing you dust bunnies the size of tumbleweeds (I totally stole that line from someone, I just can’t remember who) isn’t going to accomplish that ~ metaphorically and realistically speaking.

In the same token when I go to your blogs I am honored to read the bits and pieces of your life you have chosen to share.  But I would never presume that it is the sum total of you and that I now know ALL about you.  And I won’t offer any advice or my opinion unless you specifically ask for it.

Now if you want to know how I get my floor so shiny I’m going to have to direct you to my lovely husband.

I did light the candles though.

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Andrea Filed Under: Musings

Reader Interactions

Comments

  1. nel says

    Love the candles, and my floors never look that shiny!
    I think a blog is such a personal space and I try to accept each one as I find it…I don’t like to use someone elses blog to promote my own ideas or give advice. If I don’t agree with what I find, I don’t comment. I don’t think it’s my place. I hope all I leave behind is encouragement that supports the author of the blog. Thanks for the thoughtful post.

  2. Cindy says

    Very well said. Since I’ve been writing my blog, and scrapbooking for that matter, I’ve noticed that I notice the beauty in everyday things and as Martha says “that’s a good thing”.

  4. Lallee says

    Andrea, your sentiments were so well stated. I feel privileged to have a glimpse into others lives and do not want to bring in uneducated presumptions. Having just started a blog myself I see there is a constant challenge to just be me and try not to be influenced by how I think a reader might misunderstand. As for dust bunnies, I have colonies of those from Scotty and cat hairs. I keep saying I will one day take them and knit myself a litter of puppies. I’m sure they have some redeeming value 😉

  5. Pamela says

    Loved seeing your Beag! They are always busy, aren’t they? I love their floppy ears and their kissable snoots. Nothing better!

    And I am envious of that shiny wooden floor. Good hubby. *smile*

  7. Sara, The Wine Makers Wife says

    amen. I know exactly what you are talkign about and was rather disgusted over the post comment that had been left. Anywho. Yup. My life is drama, and stupid boring stuff, my life is full of msitakes, happy acidents, and I am no cook or wine afficianado. We are all just travelers of life and my blog is a way to remember postcards of moments that I loved.

  8. kat says

    I just found your blog. {not sure how, but I’m happy I did} I really enjoyed reading this post, so well said.

    I always try to operate with this sentiment in mind, “Be kinder than necessary, for everyone you meet is fighting some kind of battle.”